I was on the fence about becoming a creator. I watched my best friend do it with ease so I was really curious if I could swing it. It had been 9 weeks since I’d been paid and I was restricted to only the people in my household. My boyfriend said he had no problems with me becoming a creator and that became my deciding factor. All the while, our season of 90 Day Fiancé was airing. I figured it was time to cash in on the curiosity (brownie points if you can figure out which season I was on). Cash in I did!
Ladies, saying you’re okay with it and actually being okay with it are two different things.
Other then the back-handed comments he would make under his breath and the lack of interest in anything surrounding it, sure, I guess he was “supportive”. He only threw it in my face every time we argued, which was all the time. He treated me like I was being unfaithful to him and I didn’t think it was fair when he was the one reaping the benefits.
He acted supportive when I put a down payment on his motorcycle for him. (We fought later that evening because he didn’t even say thank you.) He acted supportive when I funded a whole trip to Florida to see his friends as he’d been out of work for 3 months due to shoulder surgery.
Truth is, I barely as much had showed a nipple. I was trying to figure out my boundaries and my own comfort level with my body.
You know what this extra money meant for me?
It supported me. And though It supported him; he never truly supported me.
When it all came to a halt, it aided me. Even after he broke up with me in a text message.
I was left to pay everything alone, without discussion. It was there for me when I found out that he had already been entertaining someone else and had lied to me the whole time. It was the only thing that remained consistent for the duration of that relationship and the only thing that paid the bills.
I was worried about getting back into the dating game afterwards. How was I going to bring up my side hustle with a new guy? I assumed it was a red flag.
The first date I went on I caught a bit of a buzz and told the guy ALL about it. I had diarrhea of the mouth and couldn’t shut up. I didn’t think I’d hear back from him after that. But I did! He told me he thought it was really hot that I was on Unfiltrd. He also said that he thought I was really funny and honest about it. We’ve now been dating for over a year and it’s the healthiest/happiest relationship I’ve even been in. That was something that apparently won him over. In all honesty though, he told me things that changed the way I look at being a creator. He told me to secure my bag first and not sweat what other people thought about it. He told me to take care of what I needed to take care of. To do whatever I felt happy and empowered doing. He offers to take photos, comes up with content ideas and frequently asks how else he can help. He doesn’t question me or my loyalty. He’s never made a snide remark or made me question myself about it. He understands how being a creator has saved me in so many ways!
That is how a man supports his woman as not just a woman but as a creator, and that is what everyone deserves. No question about it.
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